Quick backstory – The first time I was canned was 4 months into the job and it was obviously a shock because what the hell? It was a short and sweet moment that came and went, and I was lucky to find something about a month later.
The second time felt downright sad. I put a lot of effort into my role, especially when my manager and director both left. Without that immediate structure and little direction to go off of, I felt lost but did whatever I could to prove my usefulness and grow as much as possible. But, the organization decided to restructure and my role was eliminated. There’s nothing I could do about it and it is what it is. I’m incredibly grateful for the time spent there, working with some amazing people and experiencing things I never thought I would get to.
I’m now back in the working game (yay!) and felt it was right to share a few things with people going through / who may unfortunately go through the same thing I did. Keeping in mind everyone faces their own set of challenges, here’s what I learned while unemployed from full-time work:
The world keeps turning
I hated hearing, “You’ll be ok, you’ll land on your feet, something will turn up.” My instinct was to yell “Get out of my face with that!” (but with a lot of expletives). The truth is, people are right. This is a moment in time, it’ll pass and you’ll make it through if you keep focused.
Allow yourself to process your emotions, but don’t feel ashamed. It’s not fun walking into a supposed meeting and walking out with uncertainty about your future. Thinking about it differently, it’s simply an early-terminated contract. You would have left at some point- either on your own, the company deciding it was time, or retiring. Take it in stride and realize you’ve got time on your side that you didn’t have before.
Life is not all about work
I’ll be honest, I struggled hard with this one. I was frantic AF when trying to figure out what to do next. Getting let go once sucked, getting let go twice made me lose all confidence in myself.
I submitted applications, went through several interviews, and spoke with recruiters, mentors, coffee shop meets, lunches, etc, I realized how much more balanced my day became. I could go to the gym in the middle of the day. I cooked at home more (and got pretty damn good), I slept more, I spent more time taking my dog out, connecting with friends and family, basically living.
I couldn’t afford to travel much and still had expenses. I was lucky to be set up with a great severance package, a supportive partner and a determination to make the most of my time. It’s incredibly important to remember to live. Take advantage of those moments, they’ll never come back.
Keep in touch with your networks
I hate being the guy who only reaches out when they need something. Yet, I became that guy for a little while. I’m fortunate that the people I have in my corner are amazing people who looked out for me, sent me job postings, introduced me to their connections, and were very understanding about my situation. I want to thank all of them for their kindness and help while I was on the job hunt.
The least I can do, if not pay them back, is pay it forward by making introductions to help others. So if you’re reading this and you see me as a mutual friend on LinkedIn or any other platform with someone you want to contact, don’t hesitate to send me a message. To those I reached out to, I hope we remain in touch and will do what I can so you’re not just hearing from me in a time of need.
The side lesson is this: don’t burn any bridges. Treat others with respect, dignity, and when you can, and don’t be selfish when it comes to helping others out if you can.
Keep your head up
A positive mindset changes the way you see things and the way you act. Of course, this one is easier said than done. There were many times I felt defeated, especially after making it to a few final rounds in interviews only to get rejected. As I mentioned earlier, my confidence was already down and kept going out the window when that would happen.
However, don’t let yourself be bested by clouds of doubt and negativity. Remind yourself that things will be better and that you’re working hard to achieve something better for yourself. Those small positive affirmations, as annoying and cliche as they can be, go a long way in how you move through your situation.
Something that helped me was faith. Faith in the fact that I know I’m doing the best I can and someone will take the chance to see I’m more than capable of performing a job and being an asset.
Stop comparing yourself to others
The worst thing you can do is compare yourself to others. Yet we’re all guilty of it. Instead of feeling envy or jealousy, try to feel happy for your peers when you see them getting promotions and posting their success stories or work achievements. They’re allowed to, and most definitely should, celebrate themselves, as should you when things go well.
Another’s success is not a comment about you. The world doesn’t revolve around you, nor do the lives of others. Don’t compare yourself. Your struggle and journey are isolated to just you.
The way I look at it is, what can I learn from what others are doing? How can I apply it to my own life? This is where open-mindedness comes in handy, where you have to find the humility to accept the fact that you can learn from everyone around you, rather than thinking things are beneath you.
Be smart about your next move
In conclusion: evaluate your situation, make a plan for yourself, set some goals, and do what you have to do to keep yourself going. I was fortunate to land a part-time job in the meantime to pay bills and keep myself in practice. I’m so incredibly grateful someone took a chance on me and allowed me to show them I can do what I say I can do.
With all I went through, my perspective about work and life has changed. Yes, it’s necessary to earn a living, but it’s essential to remember to live. Life is short as it is and we’ve all learned, post-pandemic, how important it is to live life.
Nothing happens if you don’t make it happen. Put yourself out there with your best foot forward and don’t look back in regret. The best is always yet to come. (The irony of ending on that note when I said I hate it when people say that.)
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